Michigan, Again
The question isn't what happens if Michigan gets punished, it's what happens if they don't
We have explored Michigan’s journey through the Seven Stages of Sports Scandal Coping in light of the sign-stealing allegations against the world’s most famous college football staffer, Connor Stalions.
And now that Jim Harbaugh has been suspended through the rest of the regular season, you can expect your Michigan friends to be even more aggressive and even more online.
In recent days Michigan people tired of cycling through the Seven Stages and moved on to four new (and extremely 2023) methods of coping:
STAGE 8: It’s All a Conspiracy. This whole thing was conjured up by a private investigator and/or Ohio State’s coach’s brother.
STAGE 9: Actually This is Your Fault. If our opponents’ signs weren’t so easy to steal or if they had changed them once in a while, none of this would have ever happened.
STAGE 10: Actually You Did This. If we stole signals, which we’re definitely not saying we did, then why aren’t other teams getting investigated for it too?
STAGE 11: We’ll Just Sue You. Go ahead, punish us. We’ll see you in court.
You’ll notice that these new Stages involve a lot of accusations and arguments, but notably absent from the list is “we didn’t do it.” Michigan folks seem to understand that the goal is no longer to prove themselves innocent.
Michigan just needs to buy some time.
This is Michigan football’s best chance to win a national title in a generation. The 2023 Wolverines have been dominant, outgaining their opponents an average of 424 yards a game to 231, scoring 49 total touchdowns while giving up only 6.
Michigan is built for a championship run and has circled January 8, 2024, on the team calendar, the date of college football’s National Championship game in Houston.
January 8. That’s Michigan’s finish line.
If Michigan can delay and threaten and obfuscate their way out of additional penalties until January 8 they will have won the war. They just need to win a championship on the field before any additional suspensions, lost scholarships or even vacated victories are handed down the NCAA mountain.
Michigan knows how this works.
Remember the Fab Five, Michigan’s freshman class that stormed onto the college basketball scene and made electric tournament runs to the Final Four in 1992 and 1993? Of course you remember them.
But you’re not supposed to. Both of those Final Four appearances were vacated as a result of major recruiting violations. So as far as college basketball is concerned, those Final Four trips never happened.
But, they did. We all remember watching Chris Webber and Jalen Rose and the rest of those guys smash their way through two NCAA tournament brackets. They were rock stars, forces of nature that upended the sport. Freshmen weren’t supposed to do what they did.
And that’s the point: they did it. Bureaucrats eventually stripped Michigan of their Final Four banners, but those penalties aren’t as real as what we saw with our own eyes.
Be honest, did you even know those Final Fours had been vacated? Do you even care?
Once a trophy is won on the court or on the field, no NCAA ruling or mean letter can take that away. Not really. Pulling down a banner doesn’t erase bragging rights. The point of a trophy isn’t owning it, it’s winning it.
Sure, they took away Reggie Bush’s Heisman trophy, but he still won it. Even though Michigan’s Final Four banners are stored in a secret warehouse next to the Ark somewhere, the Fab Five still won those things.
And if the 2023 Michigan football team is allowed to play in Houston on January 8 and emerges victorious, no eventual punishment will delete that accomplishment from the universe.
Eight more weeks is all Michigan football needs. They don’t need to be innocent of these charges; they just need to not be guilty yet.
I didn’t know three weeks ago if Michigan actually did this stuff, and I still don’t. And neither do you, whether you root for Michigan or Ohio State or James Madison (we should all root for James Madison by the way).
But whatever the truth is it needs to be uncovered right away. The grown ups in charge need to be speedy, objective and fair, and Michigan needs to recognize that just because someone is investigating you doesn’t mean they hate you.
Losing Harbaugh is a blow, but the Wolverines can win the rest of their games without him on the sidelines. Their coordinators and assistants (and evidently staffers) do most of the game day work anyway.
If Michigan really did this — if they cheated on the field to help them win football games — and they are allowed to play for a championship, then why do we have any rules in the first place?
If Michigan is guilty, we shouldn’t be disturbed if they receive a quick and severe punishment. We should only be disturbed if they don’t.
The punishment is toothless so far (yes Harbaugh doesn't need to be there on the sideline). You have predicted what could absolutely happen if they win it all. However, it is more likely that they are exposed and lose without the stacked list of plays and a shaken set of coordinators. It will be fascinating to see what result will seal their legacy.
I am unsure how we can look at this situation and blame Michigan for being upset over the lack of due process. Every single coach and higher-up at Michigan has said explicitly that they are cooperating with the NCAA, that they will accept whatever punishment comes, after they are done with a thorough investigation. The B1G, on the other hand, really botched this whole thing from top to bottom. I think Michigan is justified in its anger to how this has been handled by the B1G. And even if this is the "best case" outcome, that doesn't change the unfair process.
Substantively, the idea that there was a material competitive advantage on the field is tenuous at best. Let the punishment come for the rule infraction, if indeed it happened as alleged, but lets be reasonable here. Vacating wins would be overly harsh. Loss of scholarships or other financial sanctions seem more appropriate (let us remember the in-person advanced scouting rule was established for financial purposes, not for the integrity of the game.)
The risk of getting it wrong and punishing a team prematurely and hampering their chances at success far outweigh the benefits.